The truth is, we can feel lonely even when standing in a crowded room full of familiar, friendly faces. 

What I’ve learned is that sometimes loneliness is not about our proximity to people. It’s about feeling alone in our feelings. When we feel like we’re alone, we’re less inclined to tell anyone how we’re feeling, which makes us feel even more alone in our feelings—trapping us in an endless cycle of loneliness. 

I call this the Loneliness Loop. 

This is just a glimpse into the highlight reel of my inner critic these past few weeks. And let me tell you—she’s ruthless. 

Would I ever say this to a friend? Of course not. So why do I let her talk to me this way? 

I’m not the first to reflect on the profound impact our pets can have on us, and I most certainly won’t be the last. But as my dog, Bentley, gets older, I find myself thinking more and more about the lessons he’s taught me and the ways he’s impacted my life. I find myself both wishing he’d slow down and worrying he’s slowing down all at the same time.

I can think back to a handful of moments in my life when I’ve felt that same uncertainty—a yearning to “reinvent” myself, to rediscover or redefine who I was.

This week, while listening to yet another episode of Armchair Expert, I found myself struck by a deceptively simple question posed by actor and filmmaker Tyler Perry … “What happens when you’re not at work?”

If you just try harder, want it more or dig deeper, you’ll get there. That’s the narrative we’ve been sold, but your success in reaching your goals does not come down to willpower alone.

If you’re interested in starting your next team meeting, event, or dinner party with a unique question, I’ve included 25 questions below.

While I watch friends celebrate with family PJs photos and Elf of the Shelf, I’m afraid my husband would not put on matching PJs with me, and our pup, Bentley, may just eat that little Elf.

If I could go back and talk to the version of me who felt lost, here’s what I’d say…